On October 28, 2021, our dad passed away. It was 7:13 in the morning, just short of 3 hours after my brother first got the call from the nurse on duty that our dad had been admitted to the ICU.
The day before, he was checked into the hospital because he had chest pain and couldn't keep food down.
The week before, he had been diagnosed with lymphoma.
The week before that, they found a large tumor in his stomach.
According to the doctors, our dad had started feeling pain beginning in June. But he never let anyone know. Not our mom, not his friends, not us. Nor did he make it a priority to do an in-depth check with the doctor. If they had performed the EGD then, they would have seen the tumor. They could have diagnosed his lymphoma earlier. They could have started treatment and we might not be here.
But we know now that by mid-October when he finally went, it was already too late. The cancer doctor believed that the large tumor had ruptured, causing an infection that overwhelmed the body.
There are so many what-ifs and should-haves. So many could-have-done's and would-have been's. I wish we could have gotten more home videos, asked to spend more time with my dad, implored our dad to work less and to relax more. Asked 身體好嗎, and how he was doing.
But it's too late for that. In the end, we lost our father, in what was a really tragic and sudden way. And there's nothing we can change about the past.
In the end we can only accept what has happened and find some way to move forward.
No comments:
Post a Comment