how to pick a full time job:

Does anyone have a guide?

In roughly one month, Polaris will begin sending out offers for full time positions for their SMLDP (Sales and Marketing Leader Development Program).

Should I receive a full time offer, I'd have roughly one month to decide whether I wanted come back and work full time with the company. (In primarily Minneapolis, MN). 

There are three possible plot lines here

A. I don't receive an offer and recruit again this fall.
B. I receive an offer and decide to recruit and pursue other options, instead of taking the offer.
C. I receive an offer and take the offer, committing myself for the next two years to the SMLDP.
D. jk, I screw it all and work part time jobs while living at home with family and our cute puppy.

Either way, I'm terrified. 100% chance of uncertainty.

I haven't had my full talk with God yet (yes, must first discuss with God) on my feelings surrounding this. But as if it wasn't hard enough to pick a college, how am I supposed to decide on my first step in my career?

This internship handed itself to me. Thank the Lord so so much for His provision. But it also meant I didn't have to decide anything. I said yes to my one and only internship offer for the summer.

And I could not have been luckier with this internship.
More on that later.

But for full time, not taking/having an offer means having the freedom to explore companies and careers again. Not taking an offer means maybe living elsewhere, maybe closer to home, maybe exploring another city, maybe meeting new people, maybe starting over again, maybe finding something I like even more.

At the same time, not taking/getting an offer means recruiting again. Redoing resumes, interviews, pre-nights, networking, hand shaking, thank you emails....every painful thing I ever detailed before in my posts and then no guarantee or security of work after graduation.

Is that not terrifying?

I have always treasured security and safety. The not-risky-way-out of life. Life itself has too many risks and uncertainties, so I'll choose the risk-free option every and any chance I get. 

But right now there's so much I just really don't know.

08.05.16