freshman day #12 (Part I)

people.

So at this point, I don't really know if anyone is still keeping up/reading my blog posts, but whatever. I can use this as my online dear diary ;)

Is it bad to say that I don't really like the people here? I mean, I'm loving the campus (especially with this new bike, ehehe), and I'm pretty excited to get plugged into a fellowship and a church, and to do well in my classes, but most of the people around here are just, ehh. Maybe it's just my crazy floor. I don't know what everyone on my floor thinks of me, but I get the feeling they don't like me very much, or just think I'm weird or something. They give me strange looks and it's even worse if I'm like in awkward mode. Honestly, I don't really care what they think. I just wish I could have a friend on the floor. I'm pretty anti-social, and hopefully at one point within this next year I'll meet the other people on my floor who hide in their rooms all day, but for the most part everyone just seems to really like to party and get drunk and play really loud music, especially at about 1-2AM. It's quite unfortunate. I really don't like my floor.

FURTHERMORE, the whole cussing thing. Plano definitely was a sheltered place and the cussing I heard among people and friends was pretty minimal but it's like first language for the people here, and they really like to shout it out too. Definitely a problem because the more you hear it, the less resistant? or irked out by it you are, and I definitely don't want to let bad language become a part of my words and conversation.

I've made a couple of good friends here, but you have to meet up separately because you don't see them in class. Instead, you have class all day with a bunch of people who look grumpy all the time, people who won't talk to you (sometimes because they pre-judge you to be an international student who can't speak English well) or people who have this d-baggish face on in class (my required course for living in the Kelley Living Learning Center). The rest of my day I sit in my dorm room on my darn floor. I understand the international student thing I mean, every other Asian I see, actually, I would say 3 out of 4 Asians I see are international students. Plus the BRACES thing definitely doesn't help. I guess people don't take me seriously, or don't really want to be my friend with the whole braces? Or maybe I'm too self conscious. But I really hate my braces. Thought it would be okay, but it's nothing like having braces back in high school. It's so much worse. I have like no confidence when speaking with people or trying to make friends. (It's okay in Christian fellowships I've visited but otherwise...) There are a number times where it just feels, lonely.

Hoping for more friendships.


THE END.
09.01.2013